I'm melting! I'm melting!!

At least I have the feeling that I am.  Melting away, that is.

In case you haven't noticed this yet:  I HATE EXERCISE!

But, I think it's finally doing something for me besides cause me a daily hour of pain, annoyance and great buckets of sweatyness. 

I think it may finally be helping me to actually melt away. 

So, every morning after the daily naked weigh-in ritual (you know you do it, too!) comes the daily check-out-my-naked-bod-in-the-bathroom-mirror ritual.  My morning is completely timed so that I can shed my pajamas on the way out of the bedroom, toss the didies in the hamper on the way to the kitchen, walk through the dark living room (I never can remember if I left the blinds up on the windows, so better safe than embarrassed), and strategically turn on a handful of lights when I get to the kitchen where our scale is stationed.

I don't trust my scale though.  I usually weight a minimum of 3 times, and average out my weight.  I tried holding my breath to see if that will make a difference.  I try blowing out all my breath, as if that will change things.  Hands in front.  Holding up belly.  Hands in back.  Supporting my butt.  It all comes out pretty much the same, but for some reason I seem to think that if I breathe out all my air, stand with my back straight and tall, put my hands in front of me and squished against my belly roll, that will somehow make a difference.  It doesn't. 

After I scamper back to to the bedroom, somewhat chilly at this time, I have to stop in front of the mirror for a quick once-over of my naked body.  Is my tummy any smaller?  Is that back roll diminished somewhat?  Are my thighs EVER not going to constantly stuck together? 

It's hard to see changes happening.  They're slow and tedious, and everytime I think I do see a change I have to stare at it for several minutes before I decide if my body is really changing or if I'm just fooling myself.

Right now there are a couple of body parts that seem to be melting away a little faster than others:
Butt shelf.
Shoulder pads.
And boobs.

If you've never been seriously overweight, you may not be aware of what a butt shelf is.  You've seen it though.  Think of the booty of a very large girl.  Notice that her ass just doesn't seem to stop.  There are some women who's butt shelves are so pronounced I swear I could set down a tray on top and it wouldn't fall off.  That's a butt shelf.  My butt shelf makes me look like I have no lower back.  Just my regular back, and then all butt.  Thankfully, it seems to be getting a little less conspicuous.  I think.

Then, there's the shoulder pads.  I never actually had to use shoulder pads in my clothes when they were popular back in the early 90's because I am built like a linebacker.  A chubby linebacker.  But, the pads seem to be receding somewhat, and (DRUMROLL, PLEASE) I can even see my collar bones (on occasion)!  All fat girls look forward to the day when they see collar bones.  It's what all the skinny girls are wearing these days.

And last but not least, there is a definite decrease in boobage.  *Sigh*  Unlike most heavyset girls, I do not carry much of my weight in my chest.  I am an anomaly to Lane Bryant catalog I'm sure, because I'm probably one of very few girls to buy a 42" bra with only a B-cup.  I'm a freak.  A boob freak.  I'm going to be even freakier if I have to get an A cup.  Hopefully it won't go that far.  I've heard of these chest exercises...."I must! I must! I must increase my bust!!"....I remember sitting on my bed in 7th grade doing those, trying to get the ladies to grow.  Ahhh....memories!

Maybe it's all in my head, but I think I may be shrinking.  I hope I am. 
I feel like a snake, slowly shedding its skin...its fat, chunkified skin.
Hello, skinny snake!