Shifting from Second to Third

I'm at a crossroad.  I'm not seeing the results I want to see at this point.
It could be that I'm doing everything half-assed.
I do realize that's likely the problem.
I track my eating half-assed.
I exercise half-assed.
I make half-assed choices.

Okay...now I'm having a very strange visual of what it would actually look like to indeed have half of an ass.  Not a pretty picture.  What a strange little euphemism we English-speakers have for ourselves.  I wonder where it came from.  But, I digress.

I've been stuck here in second gear, and I'm trying to talk myself into really revving things up and getting serious with myself and my weight loss and move it into third gear.  Unfortunately, I've never really driven a manual transmission car before, and I blame the grinding of my gears on that fact alone.  Okaaaaaay....I guess that doesn't really make any sense.  But it sounded good in my head.

Alright, so here's the bad...
I gained 4# during my 2 week hiatus from Weight Watchers, while I was traveling to Colorado Springs.  I came back last Saturday, knowing that I'd have a gain, but I didn't think it would be THAT bad.  It was THAT bad though, my friends.

But, here's the good...
I think the gain helped shock me into some action.  Right after WW's I was planning on going home because my daughter had her first dance class that morning.  (And it was SO CUTE to see a bunch of 3-year olds prancing around in leotards.  You couldn't help but smile like a big geek the whole time.)  I had enough time after WW to exercise, but not enough time to shower off the sweaty, exercise goo before her class.

A great excuse to not even bother exercising, right?!
Well...I got over myself.  Slowly.  And decided to go for a walk instead of hitting the elliptical at the gym.  I went to one of my favorite walking parks, in 31 degree weather, and walked 2 miles.  Briskly.  It was only 31 degrees, after all.

So, that was a plus.
Yea me!

I just wish all these little, good things that I did for myself added up to more.
Like right now I have a half-empty bottle of water next to me.  That's progress!  I haven't drunk water in months, friends.  Cans of Pibb Zero have been my constant companion, and though I still do drink more diet soda than should be physically possible, I'm trying (slowly) to increase my water consumption, and (hopefully!) decrease the amount of pop ("soda" for you weirdoes) I ingest in a day.

So, I have to get myself motivated enough to make these little changes into bigger changes.
I do have the motivation of wanting to have another child, now that Lily has calmed down considerably.  For three years, she was the best form of birth control I could have possibly asked for.  But, she's better now.  And I keep thinking that if God is good, then there is no way He could do that to me twice.

So, there's the baby aspect to help with motivation.  And if Koichi ever gets a daytime job, then I want my body ready for some baby-making.  [Dear God, Five years of working nights is killing me.  Please give my husband a daytime job.  I would like to see him for more than 4 hours per week.  Amen.]

And, in addition, we have a trip coming up this summer.
It was going to be a trip to Hawaii....but we decided to cancel the trip to Hawaii because of costs.
And we're just going to spend three weeks or so in Japan instead.
Oh, boo-hoo, right?  Yeah, I'm not too upset about that, either.
It would have been nice to experience Hawaii for the first time, but this way we'll be able to spend more time with Koichi's family, and I think it will be less stressful overall.

So, I would love, love, LOVE to be at or really near my goal weight by next summer.
But to do that, I have to get my tuckus in gear.  Like, really, really, in gear.  No more sliding into second.

Here's to really, really getting with the program...
and tracking my eating,
exercising daily (I really can do it, even if I don't want to!)
eating within my points,
and drinking more water.

I know what I need to do to make it.
I have the keys to success in my hand.
Now, I just have to get my motor revving, and shift it into a higher gear.