The Universe Conspires Against Me

I swear I have not been neglecting you on purpose.
Really.
I mean that.

In fact, I have been thinking about you a lot these past few days, oh ye people of bloggerdom internetness. (That's an authentic technical term by the way.  As a person getting her Master's in Technology, I should know.  It's Webalicious.)

But though I have had the best intentions of blogging, the universe in it's cosmic sense of sardonic humor, has had other plans.

So let's do a quick recap of the past few days, lest any of you cast the first stone and call me a whiner.

Saturday:
AM - Went to Weight Watchers.  Didn't lose weight.  Didn't gain weight.  I was okay with breaking even.  I intended on going to the gym after WW, so I was looking forward to working hard and hopefully seeing a good loss this week.

On my way to the gym I stopped by Hy-Vee to pick up some groceries in the organic food market that I can't find anywhere else.  Oh, a bottle of water, too, for the gym.  Got my sunglasses out of my purse, then my keys....my keys.....Where are my keys?  Crap!  Where are my &$#@(&)ing keys?!  Run to the car, and there dangling from the ignition are my keys.  Wait 30 minutes for Koichi to come with the extra set, and my gym time is out the door.

Go to Sweet Tomatoes salad bar restaurant with my little family.  The intention was to have a big salad, lots of broth-based soup, and maybe a muffin (or 2).  Instead, ate a big salad, a bowl of clam chowder, and 5 pieces of focaccia bread and muffins.  Good thing salad bars are so healthy.

PM - Planned on dropping Lily off with my parents around 1:00 so that I could do some work at home preparing for the craft & bake sale happening at church on Mother's Day weekend.  However, I get home around 5:00, and get a few less hours than I expected.  Only enough time to clean off my craft table and prep a few things for painting.  I'm sure I'll have time to paint this week though....


Sunday:
AM - Church. Errands.  (Crap, forgot to take the comforter to the cleaners...got to do that.)  Starving....so quick run through Sonic.  Niece-in-law's birthday party/ice cream social.  (Yes, in my family we have niece & nephew in laws, and cousin in laws, because our extended family members are that rockin' awesome.  You'd want them in your family too.  But you can't have them, because they're mine.  Dibs.)

PM- Oh crap, my assignment for class is due tonight at 11:45.  Better get started on that!


Man, am I craving Pizza Hut.  A personal pan pizza won't be that bad, will it?  But I need cheese sticks too, of course.


11:44 PM - Alright!  Assignment done just in the nick of time!!  Wait, there were 2 assignments due tonight?!  D'oh!!!




Monday:
AM - Work.  Worry about assignment #2 that was due the night before that I STILL HAVEN'T EVEN STARTED.

PM - Cancel chiropractor appointment for neck that still is sore.  Rush home for meeting with future landlord of house we're moving into this summer.  Too late to cook dinner.  Too late to care.  Mmmm...Panda Express can't be too high in points if I get veggies instead of rice, right?  What!?  24 points for one meal!!!???

11:44 PM - Click "submit" on class website.  Send apology letter to instructor.  Hope that she was kidding in the syllabus about the 10% grade reduction for late assignments.


Tuesday:
AM - Work.  Feeling a little less stressed today.  Hey, maybe I'll even get to blog tonight.  Oh wait, the 2nd graders have their presentation at an assembly this week.  Our presentation needs just one more little thing to give it some "oomph."  I know, how about creating ANOTHER video, sort of as an introduction.  I'm sure I can whip that out tonight in an hour or so.

PM - Chiropractor visit.  "Quick" errand to buy materials for my students for Mother's Day gifts.  Starving again....Hmmm....Wendy's isn't that bad for me if I buy a chicken sandwich, right?  But how can you go to Wendy's and not get a frosty?  Why even fight it?  Stop by sister-in-law's to see if can e-mail iMovie file from her iMac to my iMac.  Give up after an hour of trying.  Get home at 7:30.  Start making video.

10:00 PM - Stupid video.  Be more easy to make!!

11:44 PM - Done.  And it looks really good.  Boy, won't the kids be impressed tomorrow when they see it.  Now, I have some time to blog....but so soooooo sleepy....


Wednesday:
AM - Work.  But feeling even less stressed now that video is made (and the kids LOVED it by the way).

PM - Rush to chiropractor visit.  Rush to get Lily from babysitter.  Rush home to make dinner.  Sit in front of TV with last 5 episodes of The Office Season 2.  I deserve some down time after the past few days, after all.

Koichi wakes up and wants me to look at some job prospects.
Spend next hour sending resume and cover letters for him.
Get Lily to bed.
Get Lily some water.
Get Lily's Barbie.
Get Lily some new diapers.
Get whiny, crying, pouting Lily onto the naughty seat for 3 minutes.
Get Lily back to bed.

10:00 PM - Ahhhh!  Quickly check Facebook and then it's time to blog.  RING! RING! (Like phones even do that anymore.)  Talk to best friend for hour and 20 minutes.

11:30 PM - I promised that I would be in bed before midnight....but really want to blog....bed....blog....bed....blog....

THE BLOG WON!


So, now that you have run through the last few days with me, it's time for a POP QUIZ!

1.  How many times did Dorian go to the chiropractor since Saturday?

2.  How many times did Dorian eat out since Saturday?

3.  How many times did Dorian exercise since Saturday?

4.  How much motivation does Dorian have at the moment?

5.  How many excuses can Dorian come up with for not doing what she knows will work: eating healthy and exercising?





Answers:
1.  2
2.  5
3. 0
4. 0
5. About a gazillion.